It’s just one of those days

You ever had that feeling that you feel so disappointed with someone even if they haven’t done anything wrong? I know it’s weird but sometimes I just feel like that — specially with my special someone. And today is just one of those days.

Being in a Long Distance Relationship really sucks!! Going out to have a dinner or going to the movies is not possible, all those things that a normal couple would do are inconceivable. And of course, all those hugs and kisses are nothing but just a figure of our imagination. Sounds so depressing, isn’t it?

I am not really a fan of this LDR thing. In fact, I have once said before that “a couple who started as long distance and got together after a while is waaaaay better than a couple who started being together then became long distance with each other for some reason.” It’s like handing out a giant candy to a kid then taking it back after ten seconds. What a torture! And if in case you are wondering which of the two my relationship is like, well it’s the latter. 😦 My boyfriend for three years and so needed to go abroad to work and has been away since February this year.

I know distance is just a number and missing someone is just a state of mind. But during these times, words and voice are so powerful that these can give you the drive and passion to go through your day everyday. And if those two are eliminated, sadness and disappointment will definitely shoot up.

I really hate it when we do not have the chance to talk that much because for me, communication is the very key for our relationship to work. But sometimes, there are just those times when things do not go in our favor. And no matter how hard you wanted to talk to each other, you just don’t have the chance to. 😦

I know this phase shall soon pass. I know that someday we will be together again. I think I am just sad right now and I wish this feeling would just go away and never come back again.

xoxo,

CKB

Believe

While watching episode 13 of Grey’s Anatomy’s season 8, titled IF/THEN, a quote from Meredith Grey struck me.

“Your LIFE is a gift. Accept it. No matter how screwed up or painful it seems to be. Some things are going to work out as if they were destined to happen. As if they were just meant to be.”

And I was like “Was Meredith talking to me?”

I was feeling a little depressed earlier today because for three weeks of searching and applying, I haven’t found a job for me yet and not being busy just makes me sad.

I am the kind of person who likes to help other people may it be for their work or anything else. I enjoy doing things knowing that I am accomplishing something. It makes me feel alive and worthy.

So being home alone and not having to do anything at all only makes me over analyze and over think of my life and my future.

You may think that I sound so depressing. But don’t get me wrong, I am a person who always look at the brighter side of everything it’s just that when I woke up today, I suddenly felt low.

But after watching the episode, Meredith’s statement made me realize something.

Life is just happening the way it should be. Even if I do not know all the reasons behind every single thing that happens. I just need to believe.

xoxo,

CKB

Testing

My first official blog entry here at wordpress. 🙂

I am not really a great writer. Some people even told me that I cannot express myself clearly at times.

So this is me trying to develop my weakness. I am here to express my thoughts and feelings about random things and share to you my experiences as I get by my life from day to day.

I hope blogging will help me express myself a little more and gain some confidence in talking to other people.

Bye for now!

CKB